The Grand End of a Dynasty....

By Daniel Barnhart


So at last the long era of paper route children has ended. We all have memories of getting up early to do newspapers on weekends(yes I did that for the last few weeks of the route), riding our bikes through the ice and snow, collecting from grumpy customers, and delivering those nasty North Edition papers(how I hated those). Anyway on the last day I thought this should be commemorated with pictures, so here you go.

The Last Day Ever


The Beginning of the end
Dad reminiscing on his memories...
All those tubes...
Easy as cake!
The last paper delivery!
Thinking
Were going home
A hard days work is over!

Study Says Eldest Children Have Higher I.Q.s

I just thought you all might be happy to know the results of this long-anticipated study. It's good news for me, Rachel, and Ella.

Published: June 21, 2007
The difference in I.Q. between siblings was a result of family dynamics, not biological factors.

Elisabeth (and Ella) pictures

Greetings, fellow Barnharts! Sorry for the delay in getting some Elisabeth photos posted, but things have been just a little bit crazy around here the past few days. I will (eventually) get some more posted on our photosite, but that involves downloading the photos to the upstairs computer and spending some time on that (and it's REALLY hot upstairs right now....last time I checked it was 85, and I have no desire to suffer through the sweltering heat if it's not absolutely necessary).

Anyways, here are a few pictures of the newest Barnhart and her sister, too. (actually, only one of Ella, but we'll get more of those, too) Hope you enjoy them, and we'll try to keep adding more as we take them. :)


Here's Elisabeth and Ella with Grandpa Gerard - he came up to visit with the grand-daughters on Wednesday (Elisabeth was only a couple of hours old!). Ella was pretty excited to get to see Grandpa - and the new baby!

And here's Elisabeth at home with Grandma Sandy. We really should get some photos of Ella with Grandma Sandy, because that's who spends the most time together. But they're usually outside doing fun stuff - going for wagon rides, playing in the park on the swings, or playing in the sprinkler (okay, maybe that was Dad and Ella, not Grandma Sandy and Ella, but it's outside!).

WHY AREN'T THE ELISABETH PICTURES IN MY DOMINION?????

Case Dismissed

My lawyers have advised me to drop the case of Barnhart and Barnhart vs. Barnhart. This was the case of the defective car sold by one Mr Ben Barnhart of Minnesota to Mr David Barnhart of Michigan, who was joined in the lawsuit by Mr Mike Barnhart (me), also of Michigan, who had an interest in the case because he was involved in repairing the defective car.

According to my lawyers, an out of court settlement was reached that I have been assured will provide well for David and I for many years to come. The only concern my lawyers have is whether or not the payer of the check, Milkweed Editions has sufficient funds in their account to cover the large amount.

I was looking forward to the spectacle of seeing my lawyers crush Ben's lawyer's in the courtroom, however in the spirit of family unity, I will fore go that pleasure to remain on speaking terms with Ben. So Ben, you're off the hook now. I hope Milkweed doesn't mind if you sign their checks.

Birthday Alert

It is almost Lisa's Birthday, Janell says she may come home this coming Sunday and bring an early birthday gift. I know Steve and Rachel will not be coming for obvious reasons. Ben, you are probably just going to be coming back from your conference. If your plane is flying over Michigan coming back to Minneapolis, maybe you could ask the flight attendant for a parachute so you could drop in on us. I already have my present, just have to wrap it. It's easy to shop when Lisa just sends me the link to Amazon for the item.

Buyers Beware!

David and I just spent Friday evening and most of Saturday removing his Honda's transmission and replacing a worn out clutch. What a job, but now I want to warn everyone to be careful not to buy any used cars from the same person. We got this car from a shyster in Minneapolis named Ben Barnhart. He obviously has no problem selling cars with problems to unsuspecting, innocent buyers. We are thinking of contacting the great trial lawyer, John Edwards, to see if he will come to the aid of us poor common folks. It would look great seeing him crush the shyster from Minneapolis in court to help us regain some of our hard earned dollars. Think of the boost that would give his campaign. However, being fair minded people, we will allow Mr Barnhart to attempt to defend his indefensible position in this great public forum known as BarnhartCentral. The ball is in your court, Mr Barnhart.

MoleBusters!

Moles wreaking havoc on your lawn? Then you need MoleBusters!, Nikki and Twyla are the dynamic duo of mole extermination. For a nominal fee, they will root out any moles you may have in your lawn. As an added bonus, you can play war games in the trenches they leave behind. Just think, get an old WWI helmet, some fake mustard gas, and you could recreate your own Western Front. Forget paintball games, get rid of your moles and play real war games in your own yard. Call today for your quote 1-800-GET-DIRT

Mom and Dad never told us about Rebecca

So, siblings, apparently we have a rival blogger in Europe. And she's aped our blog name for herself. I'm posting this screen capture as proof, in case Mom or Dad contact the CIA, NSA, and FBI and convince them to take down the site and its cached history.

I'm all for pretty pictures of morays, but right now we've got bigger fish to fry. Just who is this Rebecca Barnhart?

Social Morays

Andy, Lexi, Lisa and I decided to go Shedd Aquarium on Saturday, to see what we could see. Here's a little sampling of our aquatic adventure. (I was too busy taking pictures to catch any names, so I have no idea what most of these are called. Sorry.)

Even though its a little blurry, you still catch the ferocious look of this shark. One of them swam straight at me opening and closing his mouth. I know that glass is thick, but I decided it was time to move to the next exhibit.



Here's a funny little turtle with what looked for all the world like a pig nose.



Ah, the moray. He had some sharp little teeth in there. And a very lumpy looking face. Actually I feel like one of the staff just stuck his arm in a tan sock and drew some eyes and a mouth on it, just to see if anyone would fall for it. I'd like to believe these don't really live anywhere...waiting for their next victim.



"Hey lady, you got any snacks in that purse?"



He kind of looked stuck, but not altogether unhappy about it. In fact, he made it look pretty comfortable to be wedged between two rocks.



Moral of the story: I'm glad I grew up swimming in fresh water.

Ella and the "Big Boat"

Ella got to see the Coast Guard boat the Alder this morning. Steve called us from work (the boat was docked right across the street from his office) this morning and said that the boat was there, and he thought it would be getting under way soon. So, 15 minutes later (minus breakfast, but with enough time for a clean diaper and clothes!), we were out the door and headed to the dock. Steve met us and walked down to the boat with us, and Ella got to see the "big boat"!

Here's a photo of Ella and Steve checking out the Portage right behind the Alder at about 8:45am. It was beautifully sunny, but incredibly windy! Steve had the foresight to tell us to bring jackets. :)

Here's the Alder getting underway, with the Portage Lift Bridge in the background. Steve's office is just to the right of the bridge, so he is able to keep an eye on the boats coming and going and keep us posted. Steve and I actually saw this boat launched from the shipyard in Marinette, Wisconsin, a couple of years ago (before Ella). It's always fun to get to see it again, and be reminded of it's sheer size!

And here's a photo of Ella and me, with the Alder heading west on the Portage, probably on its way to Duluth, MN. (Hey, Ben, you should make a trip up there to see it!) What a beautiful morning it was for us to get out and see a big boat....it made Ella's day! And then we got to go out for a special breakfast, too. (breakfast pasties and pastries)

A picture of the new dog wire- sort of

I asked Daniel to take a picture of the dogs on the new high wire we recently installed in the backyard. Well, the dogs are in the picture, and some of the post is in the picture, but you don't get the total effect from the camera angle Daniel used. But since I am doing a month's worth of posts now and it is too dark to get another picture, this one will have to do. Once again, the old adage "if you want a job done right, do it yourself" is true again.

One of Daniel's Birthday gifts

This is one of Daniel's birthday gifts from me. Saturday we installed the twist grip throttle on the handlebar, the scrub brake (a hand made oak block that is forced against the rear tire) and a cover for the clutch/sproket on the engine. The mini bike is now relatively safe- it also has a kill switch on the handlebar. So all it needs now is a coat of fresh paint and riders to test their motoring skills.

David's New Telescope Tripod

As seen on this post, David has his new telescope tripod, he seems very happy with it, and says he is soon to prove that Pluto is a planet after all. (I would be happy too if someones who owe me money for this gift would pay up)

The Shame of it all

I hate to admit this, but being the honest person that I am, I must. Sandy was ready for Daniel's Birthday on his birthday when no one else was. As documented by the above picture which I can reluctantly identify as being taken on May 18th. The world turned upside down. Now I know how the British felt when they lost the war to the colonies, Vicky.

Daniel's Birthday list

To everyone far and near, Daniel's birthday list is in the comment section of the last blog that Lisa left- the one with the weird picture of Daniel and the pathetic picture of Lisa. It is too hard to explain, but I had to put it there for techical reasons beyond my control.

ANOTHER BIRTHDAY!!!!!

Were you aware that Daniel's birhday is only two days away? Were you also aware that our youngest brother is a cherub? We've been mistreating this heavenly being his whole life. He wasn't really naughty when he was little, he was just trying to be Jesus's Little Lamb. Therefore, to make up fo this horrible misunderstanding, I feel this should be the best birthday ever. Give him everything you've got. Don't hold back when it comes to expense. In fact, one of Daniel's birthday requests was to have someone donate money to a worthy cause.



I don't think any further words are needed.

Happy Mothers Day!

This is what mom would have looked like if she'd decided to have us all at once. Apparently she would have been a pilgrim and carried around a hoola-hoop all day to keep us in. Hmmm...I guess I can see why she went the traditional route.

Happy Mother's Day Mom!

On the occasion of David's birth

Happy Birthday, David!
















I was thinking about posting my favorite birthday picture of David on the blog, but since it appeared several posts back I'll share this one: ol' Fart Finder on the job.

Happy twenty-third birthday, David. I hope the smeller finds the feller just as good as it once did.

Jesus' little lamb

While it has never been my dream to watch middle school students perform original rap compositions or self-choreographed dance routines, that's exactly what I found myself doing this Friday evening, along with my equally enthusiastic family. The Reeths Puffer Middle School had their annual talent show tonight, and the youngest Barnhart was slated to perform the "Maple Leaf Rag" on the piano. He steadfastly resisted my suggestions to make a last-minute performance change to "Maple Leaf Rap."

Along with the trophy for 3rd place, Daniel also won the favor of all the ladies of RPMS.

Compare and Contrast

Here's a simple exercise to help keep your brain fresh and squeaky clean:

Compare and contrast the picture shown here with the one below. Simply comment on the content of the two pictures for the sheer exercise and for the fun of it (sure is fun).

I recommend the following guidelines:

• Limit your comment to fewer than 18 items. Do not attempt to cover every detail.



• No fashion critiques, please.



• Be as descriptive as possible, because nobody wants to read "the thing in this picture is more ordinary than in the other".



• Don't forget to compare and contrast.



• If you're having a hard time picking up details, use your imagination.



• Use an action verb, if possible.



• Be sure to proof your comment before you submit it. If it seems boring to you, re-write it in Pig Latin.



• Your birthday is just around the corner, David, so watch what you say.



• The same goes for you , Daniel.



• References to sensitive personal data will be kept in strict confidence here.



• Try to write in iambic pentameter or haiku. If that is not possible, make good use of alliteration. If that is not possible, free verse will suffice.



• Go fix a snack before you start.



• Number your comments and, if you are fluent in html markup, color code your observations by type.



• Observations about the photograph subjects should remain positive, unless they are about Ben or me.



• Have fun.

Let's keep this blog moving . . .

Not that I don't love looking at pictures of Nikki and Twila lying on Dad, but I think we need a new picture on the blog. If for nothing else than to attract new off-beat comments. So without further ado, I present . . . Ella and her dashing uncle!



I'm pretty sure this picture was taken just after I told Ella that she couldn't hold the ducks. Although it's also possible she'd just learned that Fletcher's not actually her older brother. Both events were pretty traumatic.

Easter morning back at home base...

So I awoke late this Sunday morning to grogilly crawl out of bed and climb down the stairs to find dad laying on the floor like this:




Yeah. This picture speaks for itself. No, not really. I actually awoke to a breakfast of waffles this morning, and dad was dressed in a pink easter bunny costume singing easter carols to Twilah and Nikki. Good times around here. Good times.

A Jaunt in the Snow on Easter Weekend

A happy Easter weekend to all!

Here are a couple of pictures from our snowshoeing this morning and Ella's visit with the horses.

We've been under a blizzard warning almost continuously for the last five days and the snow is proof that warnings in the UP are a little different from those LP forecasts. I think the current total is just over three feet of fresh powder. We had bare ground on Monday and I was starting to work on plants in the yard. Winter came back on Tuesday.

We had a great time snowshoeing. Even Fletcher seemed to enjoy himself for being a Southern dog. He had been rather depressed to have spring snatched out from under his paws without warning. But some extra rations and this walk in the woods lifted his spirits.


Here's Ella and me with our friends' Belgian, Star. Shortly after this photo was taken she sampled Ella's mitten. It's a good thing for mitten strings!

Ella's been practicing up on all her animal noises and she will expect you to know your noises when she visits next week. She likes the farm animals, but she is also familiar with the animals of greater Africa and some of the South American species.

Again I wish you a happy Easter. I encourage you to submit your most Easterly picture, as we have done here.

This is not a scam. Get you're taxes done absolutely free! Just punch in the credit card numbers, send us you're mortgage, and you're taxes will be done absolutely free. Our website can be found here


Thank you.

New Ella Photos

That's right. There are new photos of Ella posted on our photosite. We'll try to get some winter photos posted soon (since it's now very spring-like here in Hancock and our snow is essentially gone). We hope that you enjoy seeing Ella in photos this way (so that it's not just a complete waste of our time to update our site!), and we know that you'll really enjoy seeing her in person in just a few weeks! She's growing and changing daily - and her vocabulary is blossoming.

We're looking forward to visiting with you guys!

Go to Mikesblogspot!

I didn't want to clog up the barnhartcentral blogspot with my impressions of Arizona, so I wrote it on my blogspot http://www.mikesblog-mike.blogspot.com/ You can go there, but I must warn you, it is a long story, and not for the faint of heart. Women and small children may not be able to take it.

Arizony here I come!

I'm off to Arizona, that great state of Rattlesnakes, Deserts, Mountains, and Grand Canyons. I will return after I have conquered them all- probably around 7PM on Wednesday. In the mean time, hold down the cushions of ease with your soft bodies while I go show Arizonians how a real man can tear up their state. My plane leaves Detroit at 2:10PM today (Saturday), I'm bringing some hand tools in my carryon just in case I have to climb out on the wing and fix an engine while in flight. You just never know.

What's With the Disinterest!!?!?!

Everyday, I check this webpage in hope of seeing the posts of yesteryears in which people posted, commented, and were merry. But those days are gone. Instead, I find the lackluster comments of obliging people. Where did the fun go??!! Have you guys really tricked yourselves into thinking you have real lives that are more important than the Barnhart Blog?

In an attempt to draw the attention back to where it belongs, I will be issuing a prize to the first person who leaves a comment.

And now, a visual representation of the activities of the Barnhart household members. You get to decide who is who.

An Editorial from Mike

Hell's hottest fires are being reserved for Weather Forecastors and Lawyers. This statement is prompted by yet another cancellation of an event because of standard winter weather. We have had such mild winters lately that when it does actually snow or get cold or the wind actually blows (like it always used to in winters past), the weather forecastors are practically wetting their pants while they shout out the warnings of death to everyone who is foolish enough to listen to them. This is the first punch of a one-two knockout punch for any winter time event that happens to fall on a day when snow also falls. The second punch comes from the lawyers, they are the insidious ones, not saying anything, but quietly waiting, anxious to rush into any calamity and pronounce condemnation and point out the utter irresponsibility of anyone who would dare not cancel an event on account of a weather forecast. You can just imagine them in court, villifing for example a middle school principal who failed to cancel an event, daring to use his own judgement, when some type of accident happened associated with that event, we all know who's judgement would be called reckless and irresponsible and liable for all damages whether it is reasonable or not. Event organizers know the lawyers are always there, and to prevent being dragged into court and sued to oblivion, they take the safe path and just cancel events at the slightest sign of inclemite weather. We are raising a generation of wimps and sissies. Why, if God didn't want us to go out and challenge the storms, he wouldn't have created monster trucks and put an SUV in almost every driveway. Worried about 40 car pileups? Humbug! most of these SUV's could make a new road around the accident without even staining a hubcap. I say, we have what it takes to shake our fist at the storm and come back laughing, so lets do it! And let the Weather Forecastors and Lawyers slither back under their rocks.

Updated Gift List

This is being posted as a request. Anyone may feel free to purchase from it though.

www.andy-mccann.com/gifts.html

Hamsterland!

I know that everyone has been anxious to see pictures of my hamsters. Or rather, everyone would like to see my improved hamster cage that I spent three nights building in the shed.

Previously, my hamster had to deal with a cramped cage (converted aquarium) that had one too many hamster toys in it. Since clearing out the toys would make his home much less interesting, I decided that the only option was to build a high-rise extension to sit on top of the aquarium. Most of the sides and the top are covered with wired mess, to keep the air circulating in there. The front, however, has a glass door that swings open for easy feeding access. There are a couple little platforms that I also built to give him room to crawl around.

By the way, Daniel, if you're reading this, can you look at the wheel and see why it's hanging down like that? I just noticed it in the picture. Hopefully it can just be straightened back up easily. I really don't feel like buying another one of those. The wheels are more expensive than the hamsters!

On a slightly related note, I have also unearthed one of the only pictures of my old dwarf hamster that I had when I was little. I admit that I feel pretty sorry for the little bugger. Not only is his food dish sorrowfully unbountiful, but his options for entertainment look like they're pretty much limited to a steel running wheel. I think the thing squeeked pretty badly too (the wheel, not the hamster). Oh well. Poor thing.

Birthday Boy Alert

In case you have been immersed in bad weather, or colds and flu, or are on holiday in foreign countries and haven't poked your head up to see what is going on in the rest of the world, here is a birthday boy alert. Steven Michael Barnhart was born February 17th, 1979 in Alpena Michigan. It was a very cold day, in fact it was -36 degrees below 0 F that morning long ago before global warming turned us all into winter wimps. If you are looking desparately for birthday ideas, call me, I have contact with a little birdie in the UP who has ideas. PS Steve don't read this blog.

Janell the Driver

20 years ago? 2 days ago? Who can tell? Janell's carefree, happy-go-lucky disposition behind the wheel is one of life's timeless constants.